Vagina Chronicles:Sex and DisabilitY


Is sex and sexual pleasure obtainable only if you’re able bodied?


Having a physical disability doesn't change your sexuality and your desires to express it. Those who require a varying degree of support to lead a fulfilling sex life, are often overlooked, avoided or even dismissed.


The invisibility and oppression of disabled people’s sexual lives in every day society contributes to disabled people’s low levels of sexual knowledge and inadequate sexual education compared to their non-disabled peers. As a result, they are more vulnerable to “bad sex” ranging from prostitution, pornography, sexual violence, unplanned pregnancies, and sexually transmitted diseases1.


Facts:

  • People with disabilities are sexy too!


  • Sex is not black and white. There are many ways to express sexual feelings and for someone with a disability, it just requires a little more planning, creativity, assistance, and trial and error to find what is comfortable and enjoyable.


  • People with disabilities don’t only want to have sex with one another. This type of thinking limits the possibility of developing loving relationships. All relationships involve hard work and compromise, and living with a disability doesn’t mean you will contribute less to the relationship.


  • Being in a wheelchair doesn’t mean you don’t have feelings “down there”. People use wheelchairs for a range of reasons. This means that many people can and still have full sensation and control “down there”. Even some people who don’t have feeling below the waist can still have an orgasm from the more ‘traditional’ sexual activities2.


  • Sex is not just about the private parts. Not being able to get an erection or have an orgasm isn’t a reason to not enjoy sex. A lot of sexual pleasure happens in the brain and can be enhanced by fantasies, relaxation, meditation or breathing techniques2.


While a disability may affect your ability to have a “regular” sex life, it doesn’t take away the need to engage in some sexual shenanigans.


Written by Gemina


References:

  1. https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/feduc.2017.00046/full

  2. https://www.aruma.com.au/about-us/blog/sex-and-disability-the-facts/

  3. https://sexualityanddisability.org/

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