Written by Wiz
Bringing in the new year gives me so much anxiety. I hate it. I hate everything about it. Adjusting to writing a new date, creating new goals, reflecting on the previous year, going out, Uber surge pricing, overpriced galas and parties, the ball drop, the kiss at midnight, all of it. I hate it. Some of us have rituals that we practice to ensure no bad juju comes into this new start. Some like eating seven grapes at midnight, wearing all white, cleaning the house, buying an entirely new outfit, or even wearing red underwear for good luck. However you celebrate, new year’s celebrations has its share of rituals.
The pessimist in me says I hate the turning of the new year because it’s an ideological construct with no real meaning, because let’s face the facts: you can choose to celebrate the new year on any other day of the year. So if you wanted to truly change, you didn’t have to wait for the clock to strike midnight on Jan 1.
As much as I would like to use logic to deflect, reality is I hate the new year because I’m entirely a “the glass half empty type of person”. I dwell more on what I didn’t accomplish, and how few summers I have left in this journey of life. The turning of the new year feels more like lost time than it does lived time. In this world of instant gratification, time is always of the essence. As the clock strikes midnight, my inner voice screams at the shout of every number, FIVE! You should’ve been great by now. FOUR! You should know what you want by now. THREE You should’ve already finished this, TWO! You should’ve started that, ONE! how are you STILL single? HAPPY NEW YEAR!!
Vision boarding, goal setting, and most new year rituals have us imagining what the “new and improved” versions of ourselves could look like. What would we look like if we were in better shape? Who would we be with for better relationship? Where are we travelling to to live our #bestlife?
Looking to the future is not a bad thing, however, too much time living and planning for the future can take away from the joys of the present. Time is rarely made to show gratitude not only for the gains, but what was sustained. Although the new year brings hope for what’s to come, sometimes it’s equally if not more beneficial to be grateful for what’s already here and what has been consistent.
It’s easy to lose focus on gratitude during the holiday season. When the novelty of the new wears off, here are a few tips for getting back to reality.
Give gratitude for the things you take for granted Not everyone had the chance to experience the turn of the decade, reflect on that.
Make room in your goals setting rituals for continuing or sustaining something Whether it’s daily affirmations, being unapologetically yourself, maintaining a financial goal, find something from this past year(s) that you don’t want to change but continue to practice in the new year.
If it ain't broke, don’t fix it Sticking to a routine can be even more challenging than starting something new.
Comparison is the thief of joy, so don’t do it! It’s hard to appreciate what you have when you’re constantly comparing what you have to everyone else’s highlight reels. Remember your path is your own and you cannot get distracted by focusing on someone else’s journey.
Make a gratitude board Similar to a vision board, create a complimentary board of all the amazing things in your life you are grateful for. Keep both boards side by side as daily reminders of where you are and where you’re going.
Don’t be a hater, be a congratulator Envy is normal. Envy is really just an emotional manifestation of your unhappiness with your current state. It’s less about wanting to have what the other person has, and more about embarrassment that you haven’t achieved whatever it is you’re envious of. Acknowledge that embarrassment, embrace the envy and forgive yourself for it. Congratulate or compliment the person you’re envious of. Know your time will come because what’s for you will not miss you.
Go on that social media fast Actually, taking a break from social media BEFORE setting your vision for the new year can help to ensure that the visions you have are of what you want and not what your timeline tells you you need.
New year, same you Most resolutions fail because people try to reinvent themselves every year. Incremental change is more impactful. You are not going to wake up an entirely new person on Jan 2. Over time the small changes will add up.